Ah Winter: the Deuce. Who would have thought that Winter would have garnered so many questions. Thanks this week go to Toadman, Dustin, Allrileyedup, Der Kieselbach, Dr B-Dawg, and Atmikha.
On to the questions:
1. Do you think Bears have it right, regarding their winter sleep? Do you wish you could go into hibernation this time of year?
I think bears mostly have it right in their efforts to get ready for the big winter nap. The gorging of foods. Mmmm foods. While I like sleeping, hibernating is a bit much. Bear “denning” is more my style, except I do like to eat during the winter. Heck, who am I kidding, I just like to eat.
2. What is this "winter" of which you speak? Am I the only one who is upset over the lack of snow this year?
2006-2007’s winter has seemed rather non-existent for anyone in the US not living in Colorado. I need winter to hit soon. This autumnal weather lingering on since August is killing me. I would love snow. I would love cold. I would love pretty much most weather other than rainy and grey.
3. What is the best drink in winter, dark frothy beer, or hot buttered rum?
I am a frothy beer guy. Rum does not agree to well with my delicate system.
4. Do you engage in any winter sports?
Nope, unless watching the EPL on Fox Soccer Channel counts as a winter sport.
5. Where have all the flowers gone?
They are waiting for the sun to come out.
6. Why is it "Old Man Winter?" Why can't it be "semi-attrative-twenty-something Winter?"
If “semi-attractive-twenty-something Winter” is near the end of his life. Hey, wait a second, you may be onto a better marketing push for winter. Just imagine…
7. What's the difference between snow and hail?
Hail is the accumulation and agglomeration of tiny ice particles into larger ice aggregates due to severe weather systems with really strong up-drafts. As the ice particles accrete in size they become too heavy for the updrafts to hold and fall out of the clouds as hail. Hail typically occurs when the outside temperature is above freezing. Snow is the formation of crystalline water structures because the air mass that the cloud is sitting in is below freezing.
8. Does Little Man like snow?
He has not had much exposure to snow. Little Man year one was cold and snowy, but year 2 and year 3 have not been terribly cold and/or snowy.
9. Snow ball fights...yea or nay? What is the longest that you stored a snowball in the freezer to smite someone with later?
Yea! 2 years
10. Ever built an igloo?
Nope
11. When they sing “Walking in a Winter Wonderland” in the world of “Alice's Wonderland”, do they change the words to "a beautiful sight, we're happy tonight, watch out for that crazy Jabberwock?"
I believe those lyrics are not quite absurd enough. Maybe “a beautiful sight, we’re happy tonight, daffodils and monkeys love to fly…”
12. How are people supposed to enjoy the season of winter when it is also a word that means the final phase of life?
One should also enjoy their final phase of life. Although, “final phase of life” sports doesn’t sound nearly as interesting as “winter sports.”
13. Has the phrase 'winter of my discontent' transcended from memorable phrase to annoying cliché yet?
Boy howdy, and then some. Whilst clever in its usage by Steinbeck in ’61, it has definitely lost its panache.
14. If Seasonal Affective Disorder only happens in the winter, why don't they call it Winter Affective Disorder?
The only reasoning that I can come up with as to why it is not called “Winter Affective Disorder” is that the seasons in the Southern Hemisphere are opposite of those in the northern. What I am not sure of, however, is whether the seasonal names are consistent through the calendar year, or by weather. So, it is currently winter here in the Northern Hemi, but experiencing summer-ish weather in the Southern Hemi. What I do not know is whether or not in the Southern Hemi they consider this Winter or Summer. Any Southrons out there who are willing to clarify?
15. Why do the ice skaters get the most attention during the Winter Olympics? What is your favorite winter olympics event?
Skimpy outfits and ice. People dig that. I, however, love me some bobsled. 2-man… 4-man… it don’t matter. I love the starts when they push the sled and yell.
16. Which is the better sled type, the long ones that you can put more than one person on or the saucers?
I am a fan of the runner sleds, but they tend to work best only in icier conditions. The saucers are really good for lots and lots of snow.
17. During the winter driving season, that means snow on the roads, do you think the number of bad drivers increases due to lack of experience driving in snow, or that their IQ's drop in a proportional relationship with the amount of snow on the ground? What do you do to "Winterize" your house/car?
Honestly, it is only the first few days of snow driving where people suck. It is as if they have completely forgotten how to drive on snow. After that, things get a bit better. As far as winterizing the house and car… I turn the heat up.
18. How do you like your hot chocolate - without marshmallows, with a couple floating about the top, or a rich layer of them? How can something so scrumptious as a marshmallow have that kind of name- it sounds like something that you need foot medicine for?
I actually like hot chocolate with those little de-hydrated mini marshmallows like you find in Swiss Miss packets. Otherwise I am much more of a whip-cream in the hot-chocolate guy. Oddly with the name marshmallow, I immediately conjure up swamp images.
19. Jack Frost - has he gotten an unfair reputation? If Winter were a person, what would that person look like?
Well, Jack Frost is kind of a jerk, really. I mean the other fairy tale characters put up with him, but he really is an insecure jack-ass (get it? Jack Frost… Jack-Ass. I kill me!!). I mean the Easter Bunny and Mother Nature are always rolling their eyes when it comes to Frost. If you ask me the guy who is completely mis-represented is Robert Frost. A baby-eater is I ever saw one…
If I had to picture what winter looked like it would be the current aged looking Clint Eastwood with a long white beard.
Ahhh… there we go
20. What is the difference between Winter White, and regular White?
If I remember correctly Winter White is a hint of blue in it, while “White” is the absence of additive color. Perceptually, people think Winter White as more white than true White. True White looks to yellowy to the casual observers. It has something to do with the degeneration of the rods and cones in the human eye over time.
To recap:
People are idiots
Wifey and I agree on that
No particular reason for the statement
Yet…
I found a gray nose-hair yesterday
A GRAY NOSE-HAIR!
How flippin’ old am I?
That’s it, I am dyeing my nose-hair now!
Don’t ask how I “found” it
It is really best not to know
On to the questions:
1. Do you think Bears have it right, regarding their winter sleep? Do you wish you could go into hibernation this time of year?
I think bears mostly have it right in their efforts to get ready for the big winter nap. The gorging of foods. Mmmm foods. While I like sleeping, hibernating is a bit much. Bear “denning” is more my style, except I do like to eat during the winter. Heck, who am I kidding, I just like to eat.
2. What is this "winter" of which you speak? Am I the only one who is upset over the lack of snow this year?
2006-2007’s winter has seemed rather non-existent for anyone in the US not living in Colorado. I need winter to hit soon. This autumnal weather lingering on since August is killing me. I would love snow. I would love cold. I would love pretty much most weather other than rainy and grey.
3. What is the best drink in winter, dark frothy beer, or hot buttered rum?
I am a frothy beer guy. Rum does not agree to well with my delicate system.
4. Do you engage in any winter sports?
Nope, unless watching the EPL on Fox Soccer Channel counts as a winter sport.
5. Where have all the flowers gone?
They are waiting for the sun to come out.
6. Why is it "Old Man Winter?" Why can't it be "semi-attrative-twenty-something Winter?"
If “semi-attractive-twenty-something Winter” is near the end of his life. Hey, wait a second, you may be onto a better marketing push for winter. Just imagine…
WINTER
(if I had a say though, winter would be a chick)
7. What's the difference between snow and hail?
Hail is the accumulation and agglomeration of tiny ice particles into larger ice aggregates due to severe weather systems with really strong up-drafts. As the ice particles accrete in size they become too heavy for the updrafts to hold and fall out of the clouds as hail. Hail typically occurs when the outside temperature is above freezing. Snow is the formation of crystalline water structures because the air mass that the cloud is sitting in is below freezing.
8. Does Little Man like snow?
He has not had much exposure to snow. Little Man year one was cold and snowy, but year 2 and year 3 have not been terribly cold and/or snowy.
9. Snow ball fights...yea or nay? What is the longest that you stored a snowball in the freezer to smite someone with later?
Yea! 2 years
10. Ever built an igloo?
Nope
11. When they sing “Walking in a Winter Wonderland” in the world of “Alice's Wonderland”, do they change the words to "a beautiful sight, we're happy tonight, watch out for that crazy Jabberwock?"
I believe those lyrics are not quite absurd enough. Maybe “a beautiful sight, we’re happy tonight, daffodils and monkeys love to fly…”
12. How are people supposed to enjoy the season of winter when it is also a word that means the final phase of life?
One should also enjoy their final phase of life. Although, “final phase of life” sports doesn’t sound nearly as interesting as “winter sports.”
13. Has the phrase 'winter of my discontent' transcended from memorable phrase to annoying cliché yet?
Boy howdy, and then some. Whilst clever in its usage by Steinbeck in ’61, it has definitely lost its panache.
14. If Seasonal Affective Disorder only happens in the winter, why don't they call it Winter Affective Disorder?
The only reasoning that I can come up with as to why it is not called “Winter Affective Disorder” is that the seasons in the Southern Hemisphere are opposite of those in the northern. What I am not sure of, however, is whether the seasonal names are consistent through the calendar year, or by weather. So, it is currently winter here in the Northern Hemi, but experiencing summer-ish weather in the Southern Hemi. What I do not know is whether or not in the Southern Hemi they consider this Winter or Summer. Any Southrons out there who are willing to clarify?
15. Why do the ice skaters get the most attention during the Winter Olympics? What is your favorite winter olympics event?
Skimpy outfits and ice. People dig that. I, however, love me some bobsled. 2-man… 4-man… it don’t matter. I love the starts when they push the sled and yell.
16. Which is the better sled type, the long ones that you can put more than one person on or the saucers?
I am a fan of the runner sleds, but they tend to work best only in icier conditions. The saucers are really good for lots and lots of snow.
17. During the winter driving season, that means snow on the roads, do you think the number of bad drivers increases due to lack of experience driving in snow, or that their IQ's drop in a proportional relationship with the amount of snow on the ground? What do you do to "Winterize" your house/car?
Honestly, it is only the first few days of snow driving where people suck. It is as if they have completely forgotten how to drive on snow. After that, things get a bit better. As far as winterizing the house and car… I turn the heat up.
18. How do you like your hot chocolate - without marshmallows, with a couple floating about the top, or a rich layer of them? How can something so scrumptious as a marshmallow have that kind of name- it sounds like something that you need foot medicine for?
I actually like hot chocolate with those little de-hydrated mini marshmallows like you find in Swiss Miss packets. Otherwise I am much more of a whip-cream in the hot-chocolate guy. Oddly with the name marshmallow, I immediately conjure up swamp images.
19. Jack Frost - has he gotten an unfair reputation? If Winter were a person, what would that person look like?
Well, Jack Frost is kind of a jerk, really. I mean the other fairy tale characters put up with him, but he really is an insecure jack-ass (get it? Jack Frost… Jack-Ass. I kill me!!). I mean the Easter Bunny and Mother Nature are always rolling their eyes when it comes to Frost. If you ask me the guy who is completely mis-represented is Robert Frost. A baby-eater is I ever saw one…
If I had to picture what winter looked like it would be the current aged looking Clint Eastwood with a long white beard.
Ahhh… there we go20. What is the difference between Winter White, and regular White?
If I remember correctly Winter White is a hint of blue in it, while “White” is the absence of additive color. Perceptually, people think Winter White as more white than true White. True White looks to yellowy to the casual observers. It has something to do with the degeneration of the rods and cones in the human eye over time.
To recap:
People are idiots
Wifey and I agree on that
No particular reason for the statement
Yet…
I found a gray nose-hair yesterday
A GRAY NOSE-HAIR!
How flippin’ old am I?
That’s it, I am dyeing my nose-hair now!
Don’t ask how I “found” it
It is really best not to know