Brook of ideation

^^Not my work, but I found it funny^^


The funny thing about penguins is that they waddle. When they aren’t waddling they are either just standing or they are sliding on their bellies along the ice in the Antarctic regions. Who doesn’t want to just go all slip-n-slide on the way to work? That is of course they aren’t swimming.

I think going to the grocery store would be more interesting if we had to evade predators to get from the parking lot to the store’s door. People would be both politer and more mercenary in the parking lot at that point. Chatting each other up as the got into groups to make a break for the door, but willing to shove the person next to them into the waiting maw of the parking lot lion hunting us down. DAMN YOU PARKING LOT LIONS!

I can’t decide if parking lot predators would cause us to go for small light trips to the market or big honking trips where you get a month’s worth of groceries. The small trips would allow for greater maneuverability, but larger loads would lessen exposure time. Maybe I am over analyzing, or maybe I would not be that good of a survivor.

My survivability would be in direct opposition to the survivability of whoever was standing near me that I didn’t know. Really, it would be an inverse relationship. Basically, what I am saying is that I would be more than willing to trip someone to ensure the safety and survival of me and mine. I would do the same for a zombie attack as well… especially if the person next to me was a prick. Eat the prick’s brain you mindless undead horde!

What I don’t get about zombies is how they function. They are dead, right? Yet they want to eat the living. What is up with that? Physiologically, what the heck are the undead innards going to do with they “meal” they just ate? Come on people, where is the realism? An undead horde of zombies would not be chasing people to eat them and especially just eat their brains. The unlife would merely be trying to kill people in order to accrete them onto their growing mass. That is the only ecologically sensible reason for the existence of an undead horde, and really, when dealing with the undead one must keep the ecology in mind.

To recap:
I have to pick up some firewood from the grocery store tonight
I just re-read the sentence, and while it is correct, it is odd to say the least
If there were parking lot lions I would not be doing that
That would be a silly reason to go
Especially when there are woods behind the house
So are you a fast zombie or slow zombie person?
Personally, I like the suspense of the slow ones
They seem more ominous and foreboding
The movies with the fast zombies tend to focus more on startle and gore than horror
Digital Thursday is tomorrow
Cheers