Tomorrow is Little Man’s first day of school at the new school. Nervousness abounds in the household right now. He was in a class that was crazily engaged and consistently successful at his last school. His classes consistently won the read-a-thons, the school spirit competitions and all things like that. They won pizza parties left and right and even won a pool party because of their efforts on some fundraiser or such. really that class was crazy close knit and very motivated… so motivated, in fact, that the parents were crazy motivated as well. A bit of a chicken/egg sitch there, but the parents at the last school were super involved and, in truth, I felt like I could never hang with their level of commitment. Therefore there is trepidation about Little Man going into a new school.
Therefore this week’s questions are all about new schools… we all have had to go to new schools. So thanks this week to Dr B Dawg, Chris Ring, Lsig, and Some Other Guy for the questions this week. Onto the Questions!
1. When did school become a verb?
About the time you need to learn something on the mean street.
2. What do you think of the new same-sex school movement?
I think same sex and to some degree homeschooling have the same issues. The potential for a serious lack of socialization and cross-pollenation. If you are only surrounded by like minded, like hormoned people, you are likely to find your education lacking.
3. Do you consider yourself more old school or new school?
Sadly I am a bit old school. The way that they are teaching these days is radically different than was taught when I was in school.
4. Of all your schools, which mascot was your favorite? Why?
Let’s review all of them. Chalkville Cougars, Center Point Indians, Hewitt-Trussville Middle School Huskies, Hewitt-Trussville Junior High School Trojans, Hewitt-Trusville High School Huskies, Jefferson State Community College Pioneers, Kent State University Golden Flashes, and Ohio State University Buckeyes…. The Golden Flashes, because it is the most vague of them all…. and I really loved my college years.
5. In a related question, Kent has an eagle and squirrel as a mascot. Why isn’t there just an eagle? There is no way that squirrel lasts on the sidelines for more than five minutes. Unless perhaps that squirrel is juicing. So,my main question is now evolving to this: Is it true that Kent administers steroids to create a super race of black squirrels to drive eagles to extinction?
Well much like the Auburn Tigers cry War Eagle and the Alabama Crimson Tide have an elephant… Kent State is the Golden Flashes, but since it is one of the few places in North America with a sizeable black squirrel population, the Black Squirrel is the defacto mascot. That being said, the squirrels are juicing, and it is University sponsored. This is to take down the neighboring, and equally vague, Zips. You are going down, Zips! Down!
6. Worst first day hazing: Starfleet Academy, Jedi Academy, or Xaviers school for gifted youngsters?
Xaviers, for certain. So much teenage angst, coupled with untrained super powers.
7. What nickname did you get your first day at Delta House?
Persona Incognito… They went all uppity and Latin on me.
8. Best lunch to take away new school jitters consists of?
Chocolate chip cookies for everyone (no nuts).
9. Is “New School” like prison where it’s best to take down a Neo-Nazi the first day to establish your rep?
Most. Definitely. Wrap around that mo-fo like a python and bite off an ear… NO ONE WILL EVER BOTHER YOU AGAIN… you will also never get a date.
10. Appropriate time lapse before letting your new school know you’re a comic geek?
In grade school? Day 1. College… 2 weeks in… because you have to go get your pull-list.
11. How long do you estimate it takes a brand new school to acquire that school (aka”milk-carton-and-industrial-vomit-cleaner”) smell?
Negative 5 days. Turns out the construction workers have weak stomachs.
12. In what, if anything, do you consider yourself New School? Old School?
New School, I feel that I am fairly capable of altering my thinking patterns and adapting to not only the present, but also the future.
13. When fish join a new school, is it hard for them to make friends or do the popular fish want to date them right away?
Well… when a popular fish goes from an old school to a new school, they are woefully under prepared for the transition. The go from being the pinnacle of social status to being in the doldrums of anonymity. However the uncool fish from the old school, spend the time necessary to re-invent themselves and become the “cool new fish” like in a John Hughes’ movie. It goes both ways…
14. Seriously, back to school sales are crappy.
That isn’t really a question, however, that is deep-fried truth on a stick. That’s called Sate Fair Truth.
15. Hogwarts: Which house would you be in?
Is there a “Funny before nice” house? Slytherin seems to be about sinister self motivated things, Hufflepuff is all about helping others, Ravenclaw is pure intellectualism, and Gryffindor is all about bravery and shit. Where does a wise-cracking pompous ass go? I suggest the fifth house of Follery Hilarimus… the colors are Purple and Silver and we are legion.
16. Which artistic school are you most unimpressed by?
Pop-Art. Lichtenstein stole every single damn one of his compositions, and he stole them from people who were not being paid crap. They were complete lifts of a composition and not homages to the original pieces and anyone who tells you otherwise is trying to sell you a Roy Lichtenstein lithograph.
17. "School’s Out for Summer": Perfect anthem?
Not especially. It is good for basically one day a year for about 15 minutes, but for that 15 minutes… oh, man, that 15 minutes. For that 15 minutes it is sublime.
18. Why aren’t there any other groups of organisms called a “school” other than fish?
That is a good question. I think it has to do with the 3 dimensionality of their group. Unlike a flock or a herd, a school has 3 axes to work with, and a pod of whales is not a school because they are mammals.
19. Do elementary schools need mascots?
If your particular institution of learning does not have competitive teams (intellectual OR physical) it does not need a mascot.
20. Do you consider yourself old school or new school?
Old SKOOL, Bitches!
To recap:
The fridge is out again
I have a crazy headache
Things are afoot
I might be able to tell you later
Curious?
Good
The playroom is painted
The downstairs is being painted even as you read this
Provided that you are reading this the week that I post it
You probably are
Of course you are
Why wouldn’t you be?
I start school next week
Have a great weekend
Good lord! It’s still Tuesday somewhere