I was hoping to have a 20 Questions Interview for all of you today, but the interview is stuck on Question 20…. Soooo terribly close. So I figured why not just look at this “Close” as a topic and roll with it… And that is what we are currently doing… rolling with it. I have this almost finished Interview with a comedian, I am 3 questions away from sending out a 20 Questions Questionnaire to a comic book artist, and I am on Question 6 with a figure from my cultural youth. All in all, the interviews are going fairly well.
Anyway, as I said, today’s topic is “Close.” Oh, English language… your words have so many meanings. Thanks this week go to Andrew Miller, Chris Ring, Lisa Sigler, the Wife, and Some Other Guy? Onto the questions!
1. The old cliche of close only counts in horseshoes and handgrenades seems sort of like my father's philosophy of aiming to be the best at things, or don't do it at all (not really a lesson I took too since I like trying new things). So what's your take on this philosophy?
I think it is intended to be a suggestion that close is not good enough in most instances, but what it says to me is that people need to use horseshoes and handgrenades as tools more often.
2. When is close enough close enough?
I keep going back to a maxim that a professor I had often stated. He said, “ It is better to have vague answers to specific questions than to have specific answers to vague questions.” He also said, “I would rather be accurate but imprecise than precise but inaccurate.” He also had a massive heart attack half way through the course and was replaced by a troll-like chain-smoking Russian man who made all the questions about vodka distribution networks, but I digress… what was I getting at? Oh, yes, you can get a horse close to water and if he is thirsty he will drink. If he doesn’t drink, I would not trust the water.
3. Where does the phrase "Close but no cigar" come from?
Old timey carnival games where you would test you skill and the prize would be a cigar… Kids would throw rings, shoot pellet guns, bounce balls, and have crazy withdrawal symptons while they jonesed for more nicotine… oh, sweet sweet nicotine.
4. Do you keep your friends or enemies closer?
Friends… as far as I know, I am currently enemyless. If I am not, I would love for someone to inform me of who my adversary is, for I will crush them beneath my boot
5. How close is too close?
Depends on the situation and the participants therein, but generally, if you are asking that question, you are too close.
6. How Close is Glenn Close?
Super close
7. Am I close to being done?
You are only Question 7, not even halfway there
8. I understand the origins and the meaning of the expression, "Close, but no cigar." I just can't figure out why anyone would want a cigar. Thoughts?
Nicotine is addictive, and the first one is free…
9. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," but "out of sight, out of mind." How close is too close to live to family?
You want to be close enough to travel in a day, but far enough that they cannot surprise you. 8 to 12 hours by car.
10. What is your definition of a close friend?
Someone who you can reconnect with as if no time has passed since the last time you saw them whether it was yesterday or ten years ago.
11. Why do you think most restaurants close up shop within a few years of opening?
Inadequate business plans… most restaurants operate at a loss for a minimum of 5 years, and then the gains are typically only marginal.
12. “Asymptotic”…. best synonym for “close?”
Not quite, but you are approaching it….
I hate myself a little for this answer
13. Would you rather answer “open-ended” or “closed-ended” questions?
Open-ended... you can't control me
14. What is the difference between an “open-ended” question and a “closed-ended” question?
An “open-ended” questions is one where the person being asked the question can use their own discretion in how they want to formulate their answer. A “closed-ended” question is one where the person being asked the question has a limited universe of options to choose from as their answer. For example, this question is open-ended, while the previous one was supposed to be close-ended.
15. Close (the verb) and close (the adjective) both have the same spelling, but different pronunciations… How fucking hard is it for kids to learn how to read?
It KNOW! Right?!?
16. “So close that you can taste it” Is that referring to our wild game hunting days where we would just take a bite out of a still living Irish Elk because we giot close enough to it to bite it? Because ewww.
I also think it has to do with heroine addicts who get the high before the needle even hits the vein.
17. How much do you hate “Trial Close Questions” when trying to shop for items? What would it take right now, to get you to answer this question? If I asked more questions would you be more inclined to answer this one?
Sales people only use trial closers because they work, but I do hate them.
18. Did you ever see “Close Encounters of the Third Kind?” What the hell is the “Third Kind” referring to?
Yes..
Close encounter of the first kind: Visual “contact” with an extra-terrestrial object such as a UFO
Close encounter of the second kind: Physical residue or effect remains due to some conact with an extra-terrestrial object such as scorch marks, crop circles, etc… A secondary effect of contact with a UFO.
Close encounter of the third kind: Contact, viual or physical, with an extra-terrestrial object where an animated creature is present, such as an alien or a robot.
19. Always leave them wanting more?
Yup, this is close enough.
To recap:
This was cobbled together in the last moments of the day
I need to get something to drink for I am thirsty
Irish Elks were HUGE
I drove all over western Ohio today for work
It was drive-tastic
Good satellite coverage though for the GPS
So I have that going for me
I am using the Vlade Divac voice right now for Waze
I miss the Terry Crews voice pack…
That made driving to and from places fun
Next week will be a 20 Questions Interview
The following week will most likely be as well
And if I play my cards right, the following week as well
And then I have nothing else in the pipeline that is moving forward
Anyone want me to ask them 20 Questions?
Have a great week everyone
oh, and give me a follow on the instagrams...