The arm injury I collected whilst on the vacation 2 weeks ago is still giving me fits. It seems to be backsliding somewhat. My remarkable recovery seems to be becoming a slow and inevitable decline into limb removal. My wrist really aches and my elbow still cannot completely straighten out. I am definitely not where I want to be injury-wise. That being said, I am significantly better off than my Mother-in-Law who, after her second knee replacement got a staph infection in the knee she had replaced last year. I know that last sentence didn’t make too much sense, but that is what happened. Don’t like it? Take it up with the M-i-L’s crappy replaced knee from last year. Now the antibiotics she was on are messing with her kidneys. Can’t get out of the hospital until her kidneys kick back on, so send nephronic good thoughts her way. PLease and thank you.
While I have been languishing around with my gimpy arm and useless wrist, I thought that Injury might be a good topic for my intrepid questioneers. So today I will answer 20 Questions about the topic “Injury.” Thanks this week go to Ring, Lsig, pfmDesigner, Chris Corrigan, and some other guy. Now, onto the questions…
1. Can I add insult to injury? Like, nice job Lance Armstrong - CRASHSTRONG ;)
Well played, but I have 2 testes… they are disconnected, but there are two of them. So suck it Lance
2. Is there a silver lining to being injured?
Not when your partner’s mom is in the hospital with life threatening sepsis and kidney failure. “OOOH, is your poor widdle arm hurty-wurty? Suck it up… my mom is hovering on the brink, you melodramatic j-hole.”
3. Did you get pampered from the family or did they say "suck it up crybaby"?
Please refer to answer 2.
4. Is there a scar? cuz' chicks dig scars.
Nope, no scar… and very little remaining swelling and bruising, all in all, it just looks like I am walking around like Captain Kirk in the original Star Trek series. Left elbow tight to my side, the forearm parallel to the ground and the hand just a little floppy while I swagger. Those of you who know, know what I mean. You are the right ones, the ones I can trust.
5. Are you going to sue the bike company? Because it's obviously their fault.
Nope, complete user error.
6. What's the worst physical injury you've had?
Hmmm…. this one is bad, but I think hyper-extending my right knee or when I strained my left medial collateral. One of those 2.
7. Better way to deal with injury: "Walk it off" or "Rub some dirt on it"?
Of those choices? “Walk it off.”
8. Do you have any scars of which you are secretly (or not so secretly) proud?
There is one on my right shin from an axe that, while impressive in my youth, only exists because I was not paying enough attention.
9. If you were to fall into a coma, and were otherwise completely healthy and safe, how long would you like to remain in the coma?
A solid 10 hours would be nice, only if it were restful, though.
10. Have you ever hit someone in the face with your fist? Does it hurt as much as I suspect?
I do not believe I have ever punched anyone in the face, to my recollection. I can only imagine that it would hurt as much as you expect.
11. Have you ever been punched in the face? Does it hurt as much as I suspect?
I have never been punched in the face, to my recollection. I can only imagine that it would hurt as much as you would expect.
12. Not all scars are on the outside. What's your favorite remedy to speed healing of emotional wounds?
Ice Cream
13. If they took the same time to heal, would you rather have a broken heart or a broken skull?
Broken skull. I feel the physical would have less lasting effects.
14. What is worse: recovering from an injury or recovering from the guilt that you did something to injure yourself?
The guilt… the good thing is that I do not feel guilty about this particular injury.
15. Head or gut?
Gut, because it will make me fart, and trust me, tough guy, you don’t want that.
16. When did they start calling it “Stoppage Time” and stop calling it “Injury Time?”
About the same time that the 4th official started saying how many minutes it was going to last.
17. Personal injury lawyers’ commercials are terrible. Do people really fall for that ambulance chasing crap?
If it did not work, they would not do it.
18. What is the difference between getting hurt and being injured?
Hmmm… In many ways it is like porn (but what isn’t? AmIRight? Up top fellas!) you know the difference when you see it. If I were pressed for an answer I would say, “I’m not your porn monkey! Stranger Danger! Stranger Danger!”
19. Is injurious as fun a word to type as it is to say?
I don’t think so.
20. Can a smell injure co-workers… um…. asking for a friend?
Well, some chemicals can cause damage, but I think the smell you are talking about can be impressively unpleasant, but not necessarily injurious. As far as Question 19 is concerned, I was wrong.
To recap:
I see the doc tomorrow
Here is the Cobra Commander pic I did for the Commander’s interview
He is looking fit and trim
I still need to do Cobra PR
Her’s is about 28% done
The Mother-in-Law is doing better
Again, send amazing nephron thoughts to her
We have these crappy little moths everywhere
Everytime we open the pantry
That are so tiring
We have cleaned out the pantry a few times already this summer
Die! Moths! Die!
That would be what I called my punk band in the mid 80’s
There would be an umlaut on the “o”
Have a great weekend folks!