Today is my youngest’s birthday. It is her sixteenth birthday, which means I have been writing this thing for 18 years… wowzers
So many things have changed in that timeframe. When from Blogger to Tumblr to my own site, and now have added a Substack and posting on Medium… also “Littke Man” from the daddy blogger days will be 21 in a month, I've been divorced and remarried and now I have 4 step-kiddos in the mix, but my daughter is the youngest of them all.
16!?!!!?!
Holy hell, how did she become 16, it feels like it has only been a few years. Time flies and all that shit.
So, today I am answering 20 Questions about my daughter.
Onto the questions:
1: Is raising a daughter significantly different than raising a son? What is the main difference between raising your 2 kids?
Raising any child is both significantly different and amazingly similar to raising any other kid. Keep them safe, fed, and happy. The “safe” piece is different societally between girls and boys. We have to teach our girls to be wary of boys because we allow boys to not be responsible around girls. The whole “man or bear” question from a bit ago is a great illustration of what I'm talking about.
To answer the main difference between my two kids… hmmm… I think my daughter is more emotionally present than my son. She is not more emotional because she is a girl and girls are made of sugar, spice, and everything nice. I think she is more emotional because she is a second child.
2: How many noodles are too many noodles for your daughter?
Sometimes there is no limit, other times 1 noodle is too many. My daughter is a fickle beastie.
3: What is your daughter's go to meal?
A Cane’s box combo, no slaw, extra toast with a lemonade. She does love a good chicken finger. This is not her favorite meal, that might be steak and lobster, this is her “go to” meal.
4: Where is the next place she wants to travel?
I think she is pretty keen on getting back to California. Primarily the LA area. That being said, I think she would dig going back to Japan, mainly for the lemon drinks that she loved.
5: What's one thing your daughter is looking forward to in this, her 16th year?
She cannot wait to be driving. That'll happen relatively soon.
6: What's her favorite TV show?
That is a toss-up between a few. There is RuPaul’s Drag Race, Shoresy, Impractical Jokers, and lately I think Ted Lasso might have entered the conversation.
7: Does she have a favorite musical artist?
I do not think there is a specific “favorite,” but there are performers she gravitates to. Kesha, Billie Eilish, The Neighbourhood, Coldplay, Joji and then there are individual songs by random people she digs, but I wouldn't say she digs their entire oeuvre.
8: Whet is a hidden talent that your daughter has that most people don't know about?
It would not be hidden if I told you, now would it?
….
She can sound like R2-D2 being shot with that high pitched vocal fried “WhoooooOOOOOEEeeeeeoooooo”
9: What is something she just loves (aside from family) without really any context as to why?
Seals
10: Is your daughter currently dating anyone?
Umm… Back off, dude, she’s just 16, and before today she was 15, you weird groomer question.
Not to my knowledge. I think we have a close enough relationship that she would tell me if she were dating someone. That being said she has a bevy of “Hoes on Snap.” Most of those hoes are hapless losers that she is just keeping her streaks up with. It's a stats game for her.
11: How are you celebrating her birthday?
Gave her a small gift and we are eating at a Korean Hot Pot/BBQ place for dinner. (editor’s note: it was really tasty)
12: What is her favorite dessert? And for that matter, what's her favorite desert?
She is super partial to cheesecake, but what you will often see her eating is one of those pillsbury cookie dough logs that you can either slice into discs to bake cookies, or gnaw on like it is a big fat beef jerky. I don't think she has ever started the oven when consuming this Slim Jim of cookie dough.
As far as desert? Imma go with Sonoran, in Arizona, because she’s been there. She has informed me it is the Gobi, because it sounds funny. Touché.
13: Does your daughter have any rituals or superstitions?
None that are readily apparent. I am sure she has some things she does around showing in horse, but those are hers to tell you about if they exist.
14: You and your daughter are fairly headstrong… what are your “go to” centering, de-escalating, calming tactics when you and your kiddo invariably butt heads?
Oooh, good question. Okay often I have to keep in mind that she is just a dumb kid who is really afraid of failure and failing. She gets that from me. We are so insanely similar that often when we are butting heads it is because we are arguing with ourselves. Stopping the argument and pointing out the emotional energy has sometimes helped. But often we just end up yelling at each other until she stomps upstairs to her room.A few hours later we will watch some tv together.
15. What inspires you most about your daughter?
Ooooh, another great question. This is a difficult question because it is hard to parse out what is inspirational about her. She’s just fucking awesome. I think, maybe what is inspirational about her is her near unlimited potential coupled with how much she cares about things (that she cares about). I am not trying to burden her with the onus of unlimited potential. That was a millstone I think that was thrown around my collar for a while. I think when she finds the direction she wants to go in, and the thing that lights her fire to go that direction she will be even more amazing than she is right now. That and her sense of humor and biting wit are truly inspirational.
16: What is the most valuable lesson your daughter has taught you?
The trite answer is patience, and she has taught me that, but let’s not be overly cliché. She has taught me to release control. I cannot control her even remotely, and to try is to get into a battle of wills. There are times when I do have to step in am put a parental foot down, but I try to limit those to things that actually warrant it.
17: What’s your daughter’s favorite curse word?
My daughter is pure as driven snow. She hugs bunnies and sings to birds. She would never say a bad word in public.
It’s “Bitch.” She loves using the word Bitch and all it’s various colloquial pronunciations bee-yotch, beech, buh-itch, etc… She’’ call a bitch a bitch in a heartbeat.
18: What is your daughter’s favorite way to spend a lazy Sunday?
Operative word in that question is “lazy.” She would sleep til 1, eat some chicken fingers for lunch, have honey chicken for dinner, and sleep some more. Laaaaaa-zeeeee.
19: Do you think she is going to be okay with this 20 Questions being mainly about her?
I think I have answered these as truthfully as possible, and to the best of my ability. I would probably give myself an 80% on accuracy. She might be mortified by some of the pics.
20: What's next for her? Be as long-term or short-term, as concrete or philosophical, as direct or metaphorical as you would like.
What's next? She's awesome, but what I think is next is her taking some time to get herself driving. I think that is the next big check mark for her.
To recap:
My daughter is 16, ya’ll
How the hell did that happen
Seriously, read this shit on Medium
I got a contract gig for the next couple of months
DUDE, I GOT A CONTRACT!!!
11 Months into this non-job space and I got a contract
Hoping it can extend to be something more, but I will take contract work
I GOT SOME WORK!!!
It look slike an interesting product/application to work with
But I have signed an NDA
I had to mow today
Mowing sucks
The days I have planned on mowing have had rain happen right as I was putting on my mowing shoes
Stupid weather
This month is a month of birthdays for the fam
My daughter, my son’s GF, all three of the stepsons, oh… and me
Cancers and Gemini, the lot of us
There will be much cake consumed this month
BITCH
Have a great week everyone